While humanity has already been blessed with things like potato chips dipped in milk chocolate and chocolate-dipped chilies, I vote that we as a species band together and unite under the noble cause of ensuring that everything be made with chocolate from this day forward. What the hell, you exclaim, why bother with something as bourgeoisie as chocolate when we’re all worried about impending wars, the ice caps rapidly melting, global warming, MERS-CoV, and world hunger?

Why, indeed.

8. Fuel for your body

Need to walk 150 feet? A single chocolate chip can give you that boost! Also, the darker the chocolate, the higher the caffeine content, so bitter is the way to go!

7. Holidays will be more convenient

Folks who believe in monogamy rejoice, for if all things were made with chocolate, occasions like anniversaries, birthdays, and Valentine’s would be much easier to shop for!

6. Versatile ingredient

Chocolate has only been consumed as a solid for about 10% of it’s existence. The Aztecs used to consume it as a bitter, spicy drink, and modern man has found ways to incorporate it into almost anything.

5. Makes people happy

If you try to make a mental list of all the things that make you happy, I’ll bet you my left foot that candy is on that list. If candy has the ability to make you happy, imagine how much happier we’d all be if we consumed more chocolate. The mere smell of chocolate increases theta waves in your brain, triggering relaxation, which is why people tend to feel better after eating some.

4. Endorphins

The sensation of chocolate melting in your mouth has been proven to induce longer-lasting pleasure than kissing. Think about that the next time you feel lonely in this momol weather.

3. Chocolate is good for you

Contrary to popular belief, chocolate actually doesn’t trigger acne! Eating dark chocolate every day cuts your risk of heart disease by a third, and also has anti-bacterial qualities that protect your mouth and prevent tooth decay. Additionally, chocolate milk is an effective post-work out drink.

2. Socio-economic impact

Why wouldn’t we want to support the livelihood of hard working cacao farmers? The more we consume, the more they make (ideally). Everyone wins!

1. Delicious

Whatever, chocolate just tastes damn good. Anyone who says otherwise is crazy.

Happy World Chocolate Day! What are your thoughts on chocolate apart from “mmm…good”? Share them with us in the comments below!