8 Things that Would Make the Cinema a Better Place

Life | 712 views

8 Things that Would Make the Cinema a Better Place

Pitch darkness and hush profound, may etiquette please abound

| August 11, 2017

4. No really, put your phone away

Via Giphy

We understand that sometimes you might have a compulsive urge to check your phone for a message you’ve been waiting for. Or sometimes you’re like, “Hey, it’s that guy!” and you want to Google and figure out where you’ve seen that character actor before. But the light from a phone is super distracting, even when you slide it down to minimum brightness. Save the Internet sleuthing for later.


3. Don’t show up late

Via Giphy

When you pop in while the opening credits are rolling, it’s a mild but forgivable annoyance. When you show up half an hour late, that’s another matter altogether. While we’re trying to focus on critical backstory, all we can hear is your awkward, nervous shuffling as you try to find your seat in a pitch black theater. Go for the next screening, it’s not the end of the world.


2. Keep your hands off your date

There are few things sadder and more pathetic than making out or getting a handsie at the cinema. Look, we understand that for horny folk, it’s tough to get freaky without a place of their own. But there is a time and place for sex, and that has never been 4:10 pm on a Wednesday at Greenbelt 3 during Armed Response, starring Wesley Snipes.


1. Save your verdict for later

Declaring that the thing we all just saw was “an extreme load of crap,” might have made you look cool when you were in grade school, but for most of us, it just makes you look like a self-important twat. So while we relax through the closing sharing our thoughts and collecting our nerves, keep your opinion to yourself until you leave the theater.


Any other suggestions? Share them with us below!