For most women, seeing the love of their life down on one knee, asking to share a lifetime, is undoubtedly a significant moment of a relationship. Let’s also not forget the meticulous yet lovely wedding planning that follows! However, the marriage proposal of this Reddit user took an unexpected turn after his girlfriend refused it because of the engagement ring’s size.

The engagement ring dilemma

In the sub-Reddit r/OffMyChestPH, one user said they had an argument with their long-time girlfriend. 

“Last February, bumili ako ng 0.3 carat engagement ring with GIA certificate sa isang kilalang shop sa Quiapo na umabot ng PHP40k,” the OP shared. 

He said that he had intended to propose on his birthday. But his girlfriend somehow caught wind of his plans, and she “jokingly” told him not to propose on the day because they had no special plans and were just staying home.

After his birthday, she randomly started telling him that she wanted to receive a 1.0-carat engagement ring and that he shouldn’t bother proposing if the ring only had a 0.3-carat diamond. “0.3 nga lang yan,” she said. “Never mo ng ilalabas yan!”

“Dahil din dito bakit na-delay at parang nawalan ako ng gana na mag-propose sa ngayon,” he added.

He had a heart-to-heart with his girlfriend, telling her that proposals shouldn’t be based on the value of the engagement ring, but on their commitment to each other. However, his partner reiterated that he shouldn’t bother getting down on one knee if he only had a 0.3-carat engagement ring. 

The OP said it hurt him because he felt she had indirectly rejected his proposal.

This could serve as a wakeup call

Netizens felt sorry about OP’s situation and encouraged him to reflect carefully on his actions moving forward.  

“Mas maraming big decisions ang haharapin n’yo, and if she’s like that, most likely, magiging toxic lang din ‘yung long-term relationship n’yo. Remember, marriage is a life-long commitment with the person you love. Mahirap na lumabas d’yan once ayaw mo na,” one netizen wrote.

Having preferences is ok, but being entitled isn’t

Some expressed that having ring design preferences is acceptable, but imposing a requirement is a different story. “‘Yung pag-pressure n’ya sa’yo to propose to her is also a reason for you not to do it anymore.”

Meanwhile, others acknowledged that OP’s girlfriend clearly knows what she deserves — but they felt the way it was communicated seemed a bit off. 

“Kaya sa makakabasa nito, kung alam mong demanding ka, never ever be with someone na hindi mabibigay ang demands mo.”

Take your cue from T.Swift

And on a lighter note, this user shared their perspective featuring Taylor Swift:

Does ring size matter?

There’s no right or wrong answer to this question. People have different preferences and perspectives, and that’s okay.

But here’s some food for thought: one study conducted at Emory University in the U.S. found men who spent between $2,000 -$4,000 on engagement rings were 1.3 times more likely to end up getting divorced than those who spent less than $2,000.

So if you’re basing your decision to marry someone solely on the fanciness of the ring, it won’t hurt to reexamine your priorities.

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