Have you ever found yourself getting confused with all the new slang in the vast and ever-changing world of Gen Zs? The world has zero chill, and everyone’s sus, so Gen Z’s made their own language to vibe check with one another — just fax no printer. Trying to understand could induce a headache of epic proportions. But what if your favorite book was written in Gen-Z speak? That’s exactly what happened with this version of Harry Potter.

The Boy Who Wasn’t Unalived

A photo of the first page of Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone has been circulating online — except the first page does not contain the original words written by J.K. Rowling, but instead has a lot of unfamiliar Gen Z terms. Harry was re-nicknamed into “The Boy Who Wasn’t Unalived” instead of the original “The Boy Who Lived.” Mrs. Dursley was even dubbed a Karen and the whole Dursley family “didn’t pass the vibe check.”

People want to buy it

On the subreddit r/harrypotter, fans of the book have been asking where you can buy the Gen Z version. Unfortunately for Potterheads who want to give this version a read, “The Boy Who Wasn’t Unalived” is only an edit of the first page of the chapter by Reddit user butterednutsquash. It’s part of a running meme in the subreddit, where users make edits to the first page of Philosopher’s Stone to create different versions.

“This was not meant to be serious. I was inspired by the other dialect parodies and also Spotify Wrapped’s tiktok / Gen Z pandering,” the user later added in the original post.

Despite this, Redditors have actually expressed interest in the rest of the Gen Z version of the book. “I’d read the whole series like this if you made it,” one said. “I’m crushed, I was ready to order it,” another added.

The Boy Who Wasn’t Unalived (full version)

When people want something, they really work for it. And it’s no different for memes like this. Redditors collaborated to create an actual full text of the Gen Z version of “The Boy Who Wasn’t Unalived.” In this new version, Professor Minerva McGonagall became “Prof McG”, while Headmaster Albus Dumbledore became “ya boi” and was “super chill,” greeting colleagues with a simple “sup?”

You can read “The Boy Who Wasn’t Unalived” here.

While we think the Gen Z version is the most hilarious, you might be curious about the different versions, so you can check them out below:

Pirate version

Holiday version

Not sure if we can describe Harry as a “holly jolly boy”, but as long as the theme fits?

Durmstrang version

The wizarding school in the far north of Europe writes its coat of arms in Cyrillic.

Grunnings Drill Company version

One thing that remained consistent throughout the various versions is the text describing Grunnings, the drill company where Mr. Dursley worked. It’s always followed by “which made drills”, as it was described in the original. So of course, Potterheads had to make a version dedicated to Grunnings, which made drills.

Scots version

The version that started all the memes. This Scots version is the only real one, meaning it’s an actual published book — and yes, you can buy it here! We’re just not sure how difficult reading it would be.

What other version would you want to see your book in?

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