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8 Reasons Why ‘Living In’ Before Marriage Might Be a Good Idea

  • Posted on May 9, 2024
  • 3 minute read
  • Edgardo Toledo
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8 Reasons Why ‘Living In’ Before Marriage Might Be a Good Idea

May 9, 2024   •   Edgardo Toledo

For eons, us ever-conservative Filipinos have discouraged couples from living together before marriage. But today, many couples are embracing this setup. It’s not for everybody, but that doesn’t mean that we can dismiss it as a bad thing. Here are 8 reasons why trying the live in partner setup can be a win-win if you play your cards right.

 

It tests a couple’s compatibility

You think you know your partner inside out. But try living with them under one roof, and you’ll meet a completely different person. Every bit of their personality goes under the microscope, from how they do the laundry and random bathroom rituals to sexual intimacy. The real question is: Will you still see them as your lifetime partner after seeing every aspect of their being, warts and all?

 

It fosters open communication

Being with your partner 24/7 means you can’t just sweep arguments under the rug, no matter how superficial they are. You have to address them head-on or create a cool distance. It’s tricky to get used to, but you eventually become attuned to their communication quirks. When another disagreement rolls around, you’ll be a pro at decoding what that abrupt sigh or puppy-eyes look means.

 

Expenses are shared

Even the most rock-solid couples need money to make their dreams happen. Sharing expenses lets them pool bigger savings. Plus, it helps couples figure out a way to manage money that works for them. Which brings us to our next item…

 

It prepares couples for how to be financially responsible

You know what they say: money makes the world go round, and that includes marriages. Before saying “I do,” it’s a must to check if your partner is either swimming in debt or a saving savant. Finding financial balance with your partner early on is crucial because your goal is to build a life together.

The 8 Things You’ll Learn After Moving Out of Your Parents’ House
The 8 Things You’ll Learn After Moving Out of Your Parents’ House
Cristina Morales | May 09, 2019

 

It enables couples to get well-acquainted with each other’s families

If both families are cool with the whole live-in-before-marriage setup, couples get a clearer picture of each other’s personalities, mainly in dealing with family-related conflicts that involve their parents or siblings. Remember, marriage is also a union between two families — forever. Dodge that messy family ammo before it even leaves the holster!

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‘Stop Roleplaying to Be a Family’: Netizen Gets Backlash After Criticizing Childless Couples
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It can be an opportunity for personal growth

Being in a long-term relationship doesn’t mean you stop learning about yourself. Living with your partner pushes you outside your comfort zone, dabbling in interests and hobbies you never knew you had! Either way, it’s always exciting to see what’s next, right?

 

It sets realistic expectations for marriage

While living together doesn’t guarantee lifelong commitment, it sure gives you a sneak peek of what married life feels like. Call it a test run, a trial period, you name it! But if it turns out one of you isn’t ready to walk down the aisle yet, you’ve just saved yourself from a lifetime’s worth of regrets.

 

Because we don’t have a divorce law

Want to know a fun fact? Aside from Vatican City, the Philippines is the only country in the world without a divorce law. This alone makes getting married a big decision, as separation procedures aren’t a walk in the park here. We have annulment proceedings, but they usually take forever and cost a lot of money before the marriage is legally dissolved. Are you willing to take that risk when you can test the waters first?

However, it’s important to remember that a divorce law or living together isn’t necessarily a solution for unhappy relationships. That’s not how the world works. Whether you’re soon-to-be married or still figuring things out, love and commitment take work, regardless of what that piece of paper says.

 

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Edgardo Toledo

Edgardo loves to write. When he's not busy staring at a blank document, you can find him drawing illustrations or eating fried chicken.

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