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The 8 (Non-Political) Punching Bags of Philippine Internet In 2023

  • Posted on Dec 30, 2023Dec 29, 2023
  • 4 minute read
  • Kel Fabie
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The 8 (Non-Political) Punching Bags of Philippine Internet In 2023

Dec 30, 2023   •   Kel Fabie

The internet moves at a rapid clip and what is the hot topic of today is quite literally yesterday’s news by tomorrow. We are often caught in a cycle of anger and outrage that goes so rapidly, we forget what we were raging at just a week ago.

This year, we’ve had quite a few people or topics we’ve really gotten collectively mad about. Whether right or wrong, the judgmental part of the internet (so, y’know, 95% of it) has decided to get angry at a bunch of people or poke fun at them mercilessly. We’re not including politicians and certain attention-seeking types (Read: Andrew Tate wannabes who want to become influencers by picking fights at random) because that just makes things too easy – so here are 8 of the topics that Pinoy netizens (lordy, do we hate that word) have been all up in arms about the past year.

 

(Dis)honarable Mention: The Kamay ng Diyos movie poster

This ridiculous movie poster was the butt of countless jokes. The thing is, the movie was just as bad as the poster and the trailer hinted at, but because it’s clearly a vanity project, there was even another film in the works that was supposed to be a part of the Metro Manila Filmfest (but it clearly wasn’t). How the mighty have fallen, indeed.

 

8. Wilfredo Gonzales, road rager?

The internet was in an uproar over this former policeman who pointed a gun at a biker. He tried to gaslight his way out of the situation, but we weren’t having it this time. His driver’s license has since been revoked, and we’re hoping that’s the last we’ve heard of him.

 

7. Yexel Sebastian, alleged scammer

After offering what seemed to be a too good to be true business opportunity, YouTuber Yexel Sebastian has fled to Japan and is still in hiding as of this writing. There were a ton of massive investment scams this year, and this one is probably the most notorious of the bunch. There are a whole lot more, though.

 

6. Neri Miranda, bad at math?

Chito Miranda’s wife, Neri has gotten a lot of flak for making a meal plan of P1,000 for a week that, upon closer inspection, was clearl not worth P1,000. It really goes to show how out of touch celebrities can sometimes be when it comes to what happens to the rest of the world, and reeks of “let them eat cake” all over again.

 

5. AI sportscasters will be the end of humanity as we know it?

GMA-7 launched their new AI sportscasters for everyone, and boy, we were not in the mood for it. Not only did the uncanny valley make us feel uneasy while looking at them, it was also very clear that somewhere out there, an actually talented living and breathing sportscaster could have been doing a much better job instead.

 

4. Daniel Padilla and Andrea Brillantes, cheaters?

This probably goes for a lot of the celebrity breakups this year, but any that involved a third party would inevitably blow up on the cheating parties. Or at least, the ones we assumed were cheating. There’s a whole lot of them there, but Daniel and Blythe are just two of the ones who earned the most of our ire in that department.

 

3. Eat Bulaga (The GMA-7 one), usurpers?

EAT Bulaga only in name, the shambling shell of what it used to be continues to trudge on, and the poor hosts had to catch all that hate. Let’s face it: these people are just doing their job, and it’s not like the original hosts are having a hard time at the moment. Still, here we are, and especially Paolo Contis is taking a beating from all that hate.

 

2. Pura Luka, drag queen blasphemer?

This would have been an easy #1 if it weren’t for the fact that Pura has a lot of defenders. As deeply Catholic as we are, it does bear asking: is it the act we are against, or the actor? Considering how people laugh off that guy who does joke impressions of Jesus, it seems that this is just plain queer phobia, more than anything else. Pura has been pummeled over this issue to the point that they were even arrested! That’s way overboard, because while people have a right to be offended, they also have a right to offend. It cuts both ways.

 

1. Abegail Rait can’t let sleeping dogs lie?

“Why now?” The question was obvious, but the 500,000 answers were just as apparent. After years of keeping it quiet, Abegail Rait came out in the open to allege that she had an affair with the late Francis Magalona, and their resulting love child is now trying to have a showbiz career. While it’s poor form to hold this whole thing against the daughter, the mother has rightfully received quite a nasty rebuke from the internet, and most everybody else offline. Meanwhile, the Magalonas have all but ignored the issue, letting it die a natural death – brilliance on their part.

 

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Kel Fabie

Kel Fabie. is a DJ, host, mentalist, satirist, comedian, and a long-time contributor to 8List (Hello, ladies!). He has an Oscar, a Pulitzer, a Nobel, and two other weirdly-named pet dogs. He blogs on mistervader.com.

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