I’M NOT CRYING, YOU’RE CRYING: Try Not to Cry Challenge
Oct 3, 2016 • Kevin Christian L. Santos
Oct 3, 2016 • Kevin Christian L. Santos
By Kevin Christian L. Santos
Are you in the mood to go on a feels trip? Want to punish yourself and take your heart to a roller-coaster of emotions? No? Well, tough shit. You clicked on this in the first place, and you’re about to go on a trip on the feels train.
Nothing beats a good, power cry. It’s even better if you make an ugly face while tears pour out from your eyes. Besides letting all those emotions out, crying is good for you. It can improve your mood, release toxins, and more. That being said, we’re about to do you a favor.
Enter the Try Not to Cry Challenge. We’ve rounded up some of the saddest and most heart-wrenching content the interwebz has to offer. To win, you have to make it through without crying, not even shed a single tear. If you win, congratulations. You’re a heartless monster with a cast-iron heart who probably hates long walks on the beach, puppies, and everything else that is good and pure. If you lose, it’s ok. You get a virtual hug.
Without further ado, let’s get started. Can you make it to the end without being reduced to a blubbering, crying pile of flesh? Let’s go.
Legendary actor Jimmy Stewart appeared on “The Tonight Show with Johnny Carson” in 1981 to share one of his poems. Stewart read “I’ll Never Forget a Dog Named Beau” about his golden retriever.
It started out with a few quips that made Carson and the audience laugh, but you’re damn sure every single person in that studio that day got misty-eyed when Stewart finished his poem.
At the 1992 Barcelona Olympics, British runner Derek Redmond was determined to bring home a medal. It didn’t matter what medal it was. He was determined to be the fastest man at the Olympics.
He kicked ass in his heat, as he clocked the fastest time in the qualifier for the semi-finals. He was confident heading into the semis.
He was making decent time. Once past the 250m mark however, tragedy struck. Derek tore his right hamstring. In an instant, his competitors left him in the dust, leaving him on his knees and crippled. His Olympic medal dreams were gone in a flash.
Still, Redmond refused to give up. His spirit refused to crumble and he decided to face adversity head-on. He stood up on his feet and hopped on one leg as he grimaced and winced in pain, determined to finish the race. He promised his dad that he’ll finish the race no matter what.
Halfway to the finish line, a familiar figure charged to the lanes and helped Derek towards his goal. It was his father, Jim. Derek was crying in desperation as his emotions took over. Derek and Jim crossed the finish line, bringing thousands upon thousands of spectators on their feet for a standing ovation. You can bet many in the audience were in tears, witnessing the courage, dedication, and triumph of the human spirit.
If you thought Thailand’s life insurance commercials are the only tear-jerking ads in their arsenal, think again. In this commercial for mobile telco provider TrueMove H, we see the importance of giving and generosity. Be kind to everyone you meet, for you don’t know the kind of shit they have to deal with in their journey.
The Thais are practically the grand masters at the art of the tear-jerking life insurance commercial. They’re like the Martin Scorsese of the genre.
This commercial in particular has already amassed a whopping 4.7 million views since being uploaded to Youtube in 2011. Watch the video and you’ll see why.
The moral here? Remember to take care of those who take care of you. Also, don’t be an asshole to your dad.
Speaking of being nice to your family…
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Having a love for fart jokes and offensive humor, KC Santos isn't as mature an individual as he thought. He works as 8List.ph's social media manager while juggling migraines and occasional bouts of weeping. His passions include skateboarding, music, dinosaurs and scratching his nether regions.
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