Having friends is one of life’s perks. It’s not every day you find people who are genuine, trustworthy, and pleasant to be around. Nevertheless, friendships have aspects most people don’t talk about or are probably not aware of. This X (formerly Twitter) discussion delves into some unpopular opinions about friendships, and they’re eye-openers.

1. You don’t have to be friends with everyone

Just because you get along with someone doesn’t mean they’re your friends. It’s okay to call someone your colleague, schoolmate, classmate, or whatever term there is to describe acquaintances. You must learn how to filter people who deserve a space in your social circle.

2. True friends aren’t possessive

I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but your friends are allowed to have other friends. Aside from the fact you’re not the only person in the world, human beings are naturally wired to be social. If you’re not comfortable with that, then people have probably more than enough reason to cut you off. 

3. Online friends are as valuable as IRL ones

Friendship looks different for everybody. Some friends catch up over coffee regularly, while others have a blast with their virtual get-togethers. Online friendships exist. Does that make them worth less keeping? Absolutely not. If anything, it shows that true friendships can weather the biggest timezone gaps or distances.

4. Normalize low-maintenance friendships

Some friendships can survive with little communication. Life’s hard, and setting up friend dates without a last-minute bail-out is a tall order. It’s not for everyone, but those who can pull it off are likely the type of friends who can hit pause and resume the fun right where they left it.

5. Don’t ghost your friends out of nowhere

Conversely, don’t be surprised when your friends cut you off after not speaking to them for who-knows-how-long. Whatever you’re dealing with isn’t everyone’s business. That’s fine. But at the very least, give your friends some context as to why you’ve gone MIA. Who knows, maybe they can help you and offer some much-needed support.

6. Your friends aren’t obligated to tell you everything

Being friends with someone doesn’t automatically grant you VIP access to their life. Don’t use the “we’re friends” card to force them to share about things they don’t want to talk about. Unless it concerns you, learn to respect other people’s boundaries.

7. It’s okay to outgrow friendships

There’s such a stigma surrounding outgrowing friendships. People tend to slap the “bad friend” label on you when connections fade away. However, most of the time, there’s no villain in the story. Friendships evolve and run their course, which is entirely normal. What counts is how you hold dear and cherish the memories you’ve created together.

8. Making jokes at your friend’s expense is toxic behavior

Friendships give you a front-row seat into the lives of your friends, including their deepest, darkest self-insecurities. Do you make jokes about them or offer encouraging words? The way you respond in such moments speaks volumes about the kind of friend you are—hopefully, not the toxic kind.