This Week in Weird News: Snow on the Sahara Edition
By Kevin Christian L. Santos
If the worsening traffic and throngs of people in malls are any indication, Christmas is just a few days away. You’d think things would ease up by now but noooooooo. That Energy Gap song is giving us a migraine and world’s weirdness never seems to stop. It’s like someone grabbing a spoon full of concentrated weirdness being jammed into our eye socket like a furious bullet train. Seriously, can’t things be normal just for once?
That said, let’s take a look at the weird wreaking havoc on our holiday season. Merry Christmas, and may the universe have mercy on us.
1. 163 new species found in the Mekong
First, some awesome weird news. A report by the World Wildlife Fund has unveiled 163 new species to the world, with all of them being found in the Mekong in 2015. The region is notoriously rich in species, with biologists finding 2,500 new species in the past 20 years.
Some of the new species are:
The “Ziggy Stardust” Rainbow Snake. It must be good at playing guitar with his band The Spiders From Mars.
Next is the Klingon Newt. It must’ve gotten its name since it looks like a Klingon from Star Trek. Thanks, Caption Obvious.
This is the Phuket Horned Tree Agamid. It looks like it’s a big fan of the Stegosaurus and listens to a lot of punk music.
You can check out more discoveries in WWF’s feature. These new species just say that there’s more out there to be discovered and the fight to preserve our environment is getting more and more important than ever.
2. Pornhub reveals people’s searches during Christmas and oohhhh myyyyyy
Christmas isn’t just the season to spend time with your loved ones and celebrate the season of giving. It’s also the season of using your hands (or fingers) to go to the fap cave and take horny self to pleasure town.
Pornhub recently released its findings of people’s search terms during the holiday season, noting that “Christmas” experienced a 400% spike compared to the previous 11 months.
Something tells us that “Christmas Creampie” isn’t exactly a tasty dessert.
You can check out more findings of the porn giant here. Merry Christmas, ya filthy animals.
3. Cat raps about giving his cat a bath, becomes viral sensation
Rapper Moshow, real name Dwayne Molock, is the newest internet sensation after his girlfriend filmed him giving his cat Ravioli (cool name) a bath while he busted out some sweet rhymes. The self-confessed cat-rapper’s video has been viewed more than 1 million times. He later told Oregon Live that his cat is a special breed that requires regular bathing.
If you go on his page, it’s clear that the dude really, really loves cats. He even collaborated with the Oregon Humane Society to rap and make a video about adopting a feline companion. Show a cat some love today! Do it for Moshow!
4. Sex shop employees fend off robber by throwing sex toys at him
A man attempted to rob a sex shop earlier this week. What he didn’t expect was that the employees got no time for his shit, nor the onslaught of dildos hurtling at his face.
— Rob McMillan (@abc7robmcmillan) December 15, 2016
The man was clearly no match for the barrage of sex toys and eventually left the store. It’s a Christmas miracle!