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This Week in Weird News: Weird New Year Edition

We’re off to a good start.

| January 6, 2017

This Week in Weird News:

Weird New Year Edition

By Kevin Christian L. Santos

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Happy New Year, weird team! We’re only less than a week into 2017 and you must’ve probably heard a lot of “last year pa ako nag-shower” jokes. That’s right, we’re not even a full month into 2017 without Tito Sotto saying something so mind-numbingly stupid. Because if you want to watch something of “quality” look no further than the Enteng series.

Speaking of mind-numbing a whole slew of weirdness ushered in the Year of the Rooster. Weird stuff like:

1. Man has scissors pulled from stomach, 18 years after surgery.

54-year old Ma Van Nhat from Vietnam had scissors removed from his stomach after complaining of stomach-aches for almost 20 years. Turns out the scissors was left by a doctor after Nhat got surgery from a car accident. Worst doctor ever.

 

2. Toy horse has detailed penis, freaks out the internet.

A lot of people complain about some toys not being detailed or realistic enough. Well, Canadian toy company Battat is having none of that shit and will give you eye-popping detail. Which is why they decided to give a toy horse a penis, because reasons.

The schlong discovery was first tweeted by @atbobb. He further adds that the other toys in the assortment don’t have any genitalia.

Look at the cold expression on that horse’s face. It doesn’t know what’s going on. Well, at least that answers what your enemies are getting for next Christmas.

Speaking of toys…

 

3. Great grandmother has been praying to Saint Anthony figurine, turns out to be Elrond from Lord of the Rings.

Makeup artist Gabriela Brandão from Brazil posted a Saint Anthony figurine that her daughter’s great grandmother devoutly prays to everyday. Though she noticed things weren’t quite right. She looked up identical figurines on the internet, and it turned out to be Elrond from Lord of the Rings. Notice the pointy ears.

THIS is the actual Saint Anthony, without any pointy ears or Elven clothing:

Speaking to Buzzfeed, Brandão tried to explain it to her relative. “We tried to explain right away but she didn’t understand at first,” Brandão said. “The next day we explained again and she understood and we got her a new figure of Saint Anthony.” Her post has since gone viral, getting over 3,000 shares with people tagging their LOTR fan-friends.

We could all use an Elrond figurine to pray too just so pesky Sauron can get the hell away from our heads.

 

4. Christian ministry proclaims Thom Yorke as the antichrist.

Christian ministry Generation of God tweeted that Radiohead frontman Thom Yorke is the antichrist. They even tweeted a photo of Yorke to showcase “8 things that Satan uses to enslave you and destroy you,” such as witchcraft, drugs, and pornography. Can’t Thom catch a break? The mother of his child just lost her battle to cancer. This ministry is probably just upset and didn’t like the new Radiohead album.