8. They asked you to turn against everything you ever stood for.

Do they really want you if they’re effectively asking you to be anything but you? Think about that for a second. If you were all about that bass, why on Earth would you agree to put up with all this treble when it clearly isn’t you? Or was the previous you just a convenient front you now drop, and the real you was the one who thinks defending the indefensible is totally a normal thing you should be doing all the time?

7. They’re still keeping their options open.

If another you could walk into their door in a minute, then you’re just being kept around for as long as it’s convenient. Imagine giving your all for your partnership to work, only for them to gush over somebody else who clearly isn’t you. Stealing billions from the coffers of the nation is one thing, but stealing your man from under your nose? Unthinkable! How can one possibly stay quiet, ano?

6. They keep dangling a carrot in front of you.

Because you won’t give it all up, they’ll keep holding out on you. And by “it,” we mean your dignity. You have to pretty much eat all your words over the last few years, and pretend that none of that was ever real, just because you crave their love and devotion, which they conveniently string you along with, because you’re never getting that love and devotion. Never.

5. They don’t consult you when they do things that concern you.

How can you possibly think of yourself as someone who’s in a relationship when you have to find out from someone else that you’re on a need-to-know basis with your love, while they conveniently forget to keep you in the loop. I mean, what a coincidence, right? So much for being on the same page. Turns out, someone else had a Go with it.

4. You’re the only one taking every word they say seriously.

Ironically, you’re also probably the one who told everyone else to not take things seriously because that would have been seriously good advice to take for himself.

3. You’re left wondering whether or not any of that was real.

Were those furtive looks he gave you a sign that you are wanted, or simply a brilliant act to keep you going long after he is gone. The saddest part about being led on is not knowing that all of these things is just the start of the realization that this relationship might be more one-sided than you think it is.

2. You keep being told you’re not good enough.

If it’s not one thing, it’s another. Seriously think about that for a minute. You try doing everything right, but they always find an excuse to not acknowledge just how great a person you actually are. Ever heard of “gaslighting?” Well, this is the textbook case for that.

1. They’ve already moved on.

While you try to recapture lightning in a bottle with them, it’s clear they already have better ideas and just want Bongbong to become Vice President, or Sal Panelo to replace you. Not that any of those specific examples matter, because we’re clearly talking allegorically here.

Amen? Amen!