Headlines We Wish Were True
Oct 24, 2016 • Mike Diez
Malacanang Acquires Penis Shaped-Missile
The Philippine-Algeria Long-Range Intercontinental Ballistic Missile (PHALLICBM-DU30) is said to be the answer to all our nation’s problems. We never actually knew how misogynistic our society was until this last Presidential elections. Maybe we do need an actual PHALLICBM-DU30, but not for defensive purposes; but rather as a monument to remind everyone who the boss is in this nation.
Duterte Bans Spoilers On Social Media
Now this one, we can actually get behind. We wish this were true before the new season of Game of Thrones comes upon us next year.
Duterte Signs Ban On Homework
A lot of people fell for this one, and we can’t blame them. Who’s got time for homework anyway? Our time spent in school is almost equal to the time people spend on work. Ditto on traffic we have to endure getting there. So yes, we can get behind this one as well.
Duterte Orders Gundam From Japan
OMG. This would be awesome! With an actual Gundam, we would never need the assistance of China, Russia and/or the United States of America. Diplomatic crisis solved!
Have you seen any fake news headlines that you wish were true? Let us all fantasize about them below!
