Prep for “The Shallows” with These Classic Shark Movies
Aug 6, 2016 • Karl R. De Mesa
SHARKTOPUS (2010)
As absurdly good as the title promises, the SyFy Channel and Roger Corman team up in this hilariously tongue-in-cheek, pure entertainment display of comically middling CGI and uber over the top acting—plenty of close-ups here. The US Navy’s next superweapon is an experimental hybrid of the giant octopus and the shark. Must be seen if only for Eric Roberts’ stellar, hardwood performance that’s par for the course of his now iconic filmography.
SHARK TALE (2004)
You’re in the shark mafia now, boy! One of Dreamworks full-throttle production animations featuring an A-list voice cast including Jack Black, Will Smith, Angelina Jolie, and Martin Scorsese—of course he plays the consigliere. This got a mix of reviews but the story of a reluctant, vegetarian shark played by Jack Black who wants a way out of the family bizniz because he can’t stomach the killing makes me all wet and gooey inside.
SHARKNADO 1, 2 and 3
Have you not yet seen Tara Reid and Ian Zering battling tornadoes spitting out sharks? What are you doing with your life, man?! So bad it’s awesomely good that it spawned two sequels, a mobile videogame, and even online videos explaining how an actual shark tornado is within the realm of scientific possibility. Well then, “We’re going to have to start calling it The Beast Coast!”
DEEP BLUE SEA (1999)
Mad scientist and marine biologist extraordinaire Saffron Burrows just wanted to cure Alzheimer’s, which led her down the dark side path of genetic manipulation to make bigger shark brains, which somehow resulted in the sharks wanting freedom from their aquatic cages and working in packs (also, swimming backwards) to kill their jailers—whuuut? Somehow these disparate elements all gel and work.
The movie that has the best way to kill a shark by stripping down to your knickers, and also has the best shark kill of the decade, you must also see this if only for Sam Jackson’s impassioned, deeply stirring speech. It’s like that: all-encompassing. Did I mention it has LL Cool J as a chef and his pet parrot?
“The Shallows” opens its jaws wide on Aug 10.
Got your own favorite shark movie? Tell us in the comments below!
