This Week in Weird News:

Anti-Abortion Disney FanFic

By 8List

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We’re inching closer towards Christmas. As the holiday spirit is expected to reach nuclear levels, so does the wide, wild, wacky world of weirdness. WTF doesn’t take any Christmas breaks, it just works overtime.

So before you go shopping for Christmas gifts for people who didn’t even bother greeting you on your birthday, let’s take a look at some of the strange things happening this week.

Let’s start with…

Scientists may have found a 512-year old shark


What was happening 500 years ago? The world was still being explored. Nostradamus was still foretelling his prophecies. The first portable watch was invented and Galileo Galilei made the first thermometer. We weren’t fighting in the comments section. And it’s possible that a shark lived through all that.

Danish scientists may have found a 512-year old 18-feet Greenland shark. Greenland sharks live for up to centuries, but this guy went all the way to 500 years.

Still, Senator Enrile might even get to outlive this shark. His secret? Bathing in the blood of innocents.

 

Minion steals lawn from homeowner and proves he’s a douche by taunting him

despicable

“DESPICABLE” ACT

A despicable act has been caught on CCTV.
Security vision shows a prankster, dressed as a minion, digging up a patch of grass from the front garden of a South Kalgoorlie home.
And now the householders want answers.

Posted by GWN7 News on Wednesday, December 6, 2017

Proving that Minions are the spawn of Satan, one particular Minion is terrorizing a man in Australia by stealing his lawn and taunting him online.

Bradley Nicklin woke up and found a part of his lawn had vanished. CCTV footage showed a despicable Minion walk into his yard with a shovel in hand.

Not content to the theft, the Minion took things further by creating a “Carl Minion” profile on Facebook to torment Nicklin. It even has photos of him running around with a shovel with a patch of the lawn in hand.


Minions are the worst.

 

This Zootopia fanfic may or may not be about anti-abortion


How would you like your Disney cartoons with a dash of propaganda?

A Zootopia comic fanfic titled “I Will Survive” was released earlier this year by artist William Borba. The comic details Judy Hopps being impregnated by Nick Wilde. Curious? You can read it here.

Naturally, people had thoughts about the comic.

Because people would always normally imagine Disney characters boning each other. Ever watched a Disney cartoon and ever wondered, hmmm, this would be even better with a dash of unwanted pregnancy? No? Moving on, then.

 

This Italian family can’t feel any pain


Via Giphy

A 78-year old woman, her two daughters and their three children can’t sense temperature. They can’t feel any pain either. They don’t even notice if they have had their bones broken. Now, scientists are trying to figure out why.

Speaking to New Scientist, James Cox from the University College London says the family feel “pain in the initial break but it goes away very quickly.” He adds, Letizia broke her shoulder while skiing, but then kept skiing for the rest of the day and drove home. She didn’t get it checked out until the next day.”

Cox and his team found out that though the family has a normal number of nerves in their skin, they all have a mutation in their gene called ZFHX2. When Cox and his team deleted this gene in mice, they found the creatures weren’t sensing pain when pressure was applied on their tales. They were however, hypersensitive to heat. This may suggest that the gene may be tied to what we perceive as painful or not.

Cox and his team hope that further studies could help in reducing the feeling of pain and hopefully develop drugs to achieve that effect. Think of all chronic pain sufferers that could benefit from this drug.

We also wish we couldn’t feel any pain from all the times our dad didn’t hug us.

British surgeon has been burning his initials to people’s livers because he’s an asshole


Via Giphy

In douchenozzles of the week news, British surgeon Simon Bramhall has pleaded guilty for assaulting two patients by branding his initials onto their livers during organ transplant procedures.

NPR reports that “Bramhall used an argon beam coagulator, which seals bleeding blood vessels with an electric beam, to mark his initials on the organs.”

The Guardian also states that the argon beam is not enough to damage the organ as the marks usually disappear by themselves.

On the positive side, at least he didn’t brand a penis onto the liver. You gotta look at this with a glass half-full.

 

Computer writes weird new Harry Potter chapter


A predictive keyboard has written a new chapter in the Harry Potter series. Its title? “Harry Potter and the Portrait of What Looked Like a Large Pile of Ash.” Sounds like a real page-turner.

The chapter was created by Botnik Studios, who fed all seven chapters of the book through their computer program.

Here are some choice lines from the chapter:

 

“He saw Harry and immediately began to eat Hermione’s family.”

“Harry tore his eyes from his head and threw them into the forest.

“Voldemort raised his eyebrows at Harry, who could not see anything at the moment.”

 

Still, this sounds a lot better than having a damned Zootopia pregnancy comic.

 

“Dear David” ghost child has reappeared and DEAR GOD NO


If you’re not familiar with the whole Dear David saga, START NOW. It’s basically about New York-based illustrator Adam Ellis narrating the creepy things happening in his apartment as a ghost is terrorizing him. Get up to speed here.

His latest entry to the saga has even more scary pictures of the alleged ghost child.

You can check out more from his Twitter account. Frankly, we’d like to get some sleep tonight, thank you.

 

Here are the most hilarious wildlife photos for the year


Wildlife photographer Tibor Kércz bagged the top award in the Comedy Wildlife Photo Awards this year. His photo depicts a tiny owl falling from a branch.

And it’s safe!

Here are some of the winners and finalists this year:

The more we see animals, the more we realize people suck.

 

What was the weirdest? Tell us below!

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