The number of people who prefer having  sex with robots is about to surge because reasons

Nalulungkot at walang makausap? Single since birth? You might want to consider getting it on with robots.

Studies have shown that the number of men whose only romantic and sexual relationships with sex dolls will surge. Sex dolls today are common. There’s even a brothel staffed entirely by robots. Not kidding.

Ethics researchers Neil McArthur and Markie Twist of the University of Manitoba says that psychotherapists should prepare for people actively engaging in “digisexualities.” These digisexuals might soon shun intimate relationships with their fellow humans and opt for virtual reality porn and sex robots.

If you’re single, don’t worry. You might not have met the right person and programmed them yet.

Speaking of sex…

There’s now a smart condom that can tell your performance if you’re into that sort of thing

The i.Con smart condom can collect intimate data of the men who wear it. It can also help detect STIs like chlamydia. The question is, are you brave enough to wear it?

British Condoms say that the i.Con can also measure the number of calories burned during s*x, the speed of your thrusts, and even the positions used.

How does it work? No, it’s not a reusable condom. The i.Con is a band that fits around the bottom of your schlong. That means you need to put on an actual condom first before you get to experience the i.Con’s effects and see if you’re a total stud muffin or a floppy bird.

There was a time capsule found in the butt of a statue of Jesus

Here’s something you don’t see everyday.

Restorers of an 18^th century Jesus Christ statue have found a note hidden inside the Son of God’s butt. The note dats back to 1777. Not making this up.

Sadly, the note didn’t say anything about Christ’s return or any other mind-blowing revelation. Instead, it discussed Spain’s popular pastimes, famous people, religious and political matters among others. It was signed by Joaquin Minguez, priest of the cathedral of Burgo de Osma.

Which begs the question, why would anyone want to look inside a statue’s butt?

Elon Musk drops the mic on flat-earthers

It’s 2017, and we have people believing that the Earth is flat. The Flat Earth Society believe that, you guessed it, our world is indeed flat and anything that suggests otherwise is part of a conspiracy conjured up by NASA. This is a good reason to stay in school, kids.

Recently, Tesla and SpaceX head honcho, billionaire, engineer, inventor, and possibly the smartest man alive who can beat your daddy up Elon Musk wondered why is there no Flat Mars Society?

Why is there no Flat Mars Society!?

— Elon Musk (@elonmusk) November 28, 2017

The Flat Earth Society decided to reply:

Hi Elon, thanks for the question. Unlike the Earth, Mars has been observed to be round.

We hope you have a fantastic day!

— Flat Earth Society (@FlatEarthOrg) November 28, 2017

Observed to be round? Observed by who? We’re confused. They also gave us this gem:

It’s a hypothetical possibility, but not one that’s backed by any evidence to date.

— Flat Earth Society (@FlatEarthOrg) November 29, 2017

Never mind that we’ve already had decades of data and evidence that prove Mars AND the Earth are spheres.

Stay in school, kids. And don’t do crack.

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