4. You have enough room to do capoeira inside the train.
As comedian GB Labrador often says, capoeira is the most useless martial art in the Philippines, where the concept of personal space is just a faint glimmer of optimism in someone’s yet-to-become-cynical eye.
If you have enough room to start a capoeira session, say it with me: you’re probably receiving some special treatment because that just doesn’t happen anymore.
3. Someone holds an umbrella for you while you’re in line.
Do we even need to explain this, Mr. Abaya?
Listen. If you have to be treated like a complete senyorito just so you could have a “pleasant” experience riding the MRT, then you’re probably not in the same tax bracket as the average Filipino who needs to ride the train on a regular basis.
2. You have press coverage while on the train.
If you have so much room that you can accommodate the press getting in your face instead of someone else’s unmentionable body parts, then maybe you’re not exactly putting yourself through what our daily commuters have to endure on a regular basis.
1. Nobody is eyeing you judgingly for taking a seat.
If you’re a guy, some lady who’s had a long day will be giving you the stink-eye for not offering your seat.
If you’re a lady, an elderly gentleman will be tsk-tsking away as you try to ignore his passive-aggressive behavior as you try to so much as stretch your toes (sorry, there’s no room for stretching your legs here).
If you’re an elderly gentleman, there will be a pregnant woman glaring at you incessantly because she too, needs the relief of a seat in the middle of this sea of apathy, misery, and sweat.
But if you’re VIP material, anyone who might want to look at you wrong is being asked to not enter your carriage at all. Because you’re special like that.
WATCH: LRT1 security personnel prohibiting commuters from entering train carriage where Presidential Spox Harry Roque is in. pic.twitter.com/1FA0SgWTmo
— Pia Ranada (@piaranada) November 23, 2017
So maybe the next time some well-meaning but wrong-headed public official wants to downplay how bad our commuting situation in the metro is, maybe they should surrender their privileges at the ticketing line, the way everybody else does.
Got anything more to add? Tell us your thoughts below!