the Play Girls
Need to Realize ASAP
By Kaira Guererro
I’m pretty sure you’ve heard about another unusual ‘talent’ involving four girls and a car showcased in Pilipinas Got Talent over the weekend. If you haven’t then please tell us which rock you’re living under so we could all huddle under it and be spared from performances like that one.
The Play Girls, as they so bravely pertained to themselves, proceeded to give their names one by one (each name creatively preceded with ‘Play Girl’). At this point jackets were wrapped around their waists but we had a sinking feeling about what they’re going to do next, something about the way they squirmed on stage and Robin’s sharky smiles.
They performed a breathtaking talent of, simply put, washing a car in their underwear. Breathtaking because by the time they were finished we were impatiently waiting for the judges to roast them. With everything that happened afterwards, we wouldn’t blame them if they were harboring grudges, but here’s what these girls need to realize:
1. Carwash isn’t a talent
Ilabas ang kotse!
They entered a contest to wash a car in their underwear. Carwash is a skill that many of us know how to properly do, by the way; it involves being meticulous and making sure the car is clean inside out. If you wash a car in an exceptional way, say cleaning it inside out in less than 10 minutes then that, my dear girls, is talent. But squeezing a sponge to your chest, pouring a bucket of water on yourself, and twerking all the while is sadly not a talent.
Also, I hate to say it but you missed a lot of spots.
2. PGT is all about ‘world class talent and phenomenal performances’, not looks
“Ano tawag sa talent nyo?”
“Car wash po.”
The show is called Pilipinas Got Talent for crying out loud. The Play Girls might have chosen to show 80% skin, twerk, and split thinking they would get a resounding yes from all four judges but what they should have done is refine their talent. Did they really think sprinkling water on a car would grant them a spot? They could have attempted to form a human pyramid, acrobatics, gymnastics, roared fire, or even do a sing and dance number!
When Angel Locsin had a chance to comment on the performance she pointedly said “Talento ang hanap namin dito at hindi katawan.” Vice Ganda even added that if they did have great car washing talent (pah!), they could do it in pajamas for all he cares and he would still be wowed.
3. Smiling on camera and then dissing the judge on social media is an act of cowardice
Of course, they didn’t get in but what very nearly caused brain cancer to netizens is that the beloved Play Girls had the gall to vent out their frustration on social media despite staying silent during the audition. They might not have anticipated the slew of Sherlock netizens armed with the ability of being able to screenshot their posts and since screenshots are the weapons of online lawyers now, the girls were immediately caught posting garbage about Angel Locsin.
They especially dissed her based on the fact that she once took on the role of Darna, a superhero with a two-piece suit running around protecting citizens. Girls, there’s a stark difference between you washing a car in your underwear and Angel Locsin saving the world in a Darna costume.
4. They entered a contest well aware they would be judged
The rules in entering contests typically aired nationwide are: prepare to be judged and prepare to be judged publicly. If you come emotionally unprepared then you’re done for; either you stay in a corner for 2 weeks in embarrassment or come out of the audition victorious. Handling defeat is an imperative if you’re a performer.