Using “Creative Imagination” to Interpret 8 Things The President Has (Probably) Said
Oct 6, 2016 • Kel Fabie
What It Seems To Mean: We should stop being too buddy-buddy with America and move on from our longstanding relationship with them.
Likely Context: America may be an ally, but there are many other countries we can be allied with, including China and Russia. As a sovereign nation, we need to keep our options open and not be overdependent on just one.
Creative Interpretation: In Southern California, a very famous steak restaurant known as Pinnacle Peak has a “no ties” policy. Here, they insist on casual dining so much, that anyone wearing a tie is asked to either take it off, or the staff will cut their neckties off for them. It should be obvious that this is what the president meant when he will “cut ties” with America. They will have some delicious steak.
Maybe when he promised to kill 100,000, he meant neckties.
What It Seems To Mean: His penis. He’s talking about his penis.
Likely Context: He is talking about his penis in front of the press. Woohoo!
Creative Interpretation: He was doing his own version of the PPAP song. He had a pen, and a niece… wait. This might not be going somewhere good.
What It Seems To Mean: Your mother is a whore.
Likely Context: Someone probably annoyed the president, or he’s joking, or he’s emphasizing something, or he’s leading a prayer. Look, he’s practically used these two words in every conceivable context by now, okay?
Creative Interpretation: One of the Ten Commandments is “honor thy father and thy mother.” Take note that it said nothing about honoring other people’s mothers. The President is simply following the Ten Commandments as best as he can.
What It Seems To Mean: Two piece Chickenjoy meal with extra rice, and upsized Coke.
Likely Context: The President is probably making an order for food in Jollibee.
Creative Interpretation: “Champ meal, no tomato, with regular fries, less salt and Sprite, diet, and a Jolly Hotdog, ala carte.”
Have you got your own creative imagination interpretation of some select quips of our President? Do share them with us in the comments section!
