Over the weekend, the Philippine Drug Enforcement Agency, PDEA, announced that they acquired P189 million worth of vehicle and computer equipment such as body cams, drones, and cameras for their continued ‘war on drugs’. Add to that the proposed P4 BILLION allotment for school drug testing and we’re really talking about huge numbers. Now we’re not discounting the PDEA’s efforts in addressing the country’s drug problems, but since we’re talking huge amounts  we think that they should also allot some budget on these essentials:

Pilots

You will need pilots for those drones. I suppose the government can generate jobs by purchasing those equipment!

Shirts

These days, going out shirtless seems to be a crime, as PNP officials brand you as tambay, even when you’re just outside your damn house. So for everyone’s sake, give men, nay people, shirts. Problem solved!

Basketball Courts

Since the government really hates tambays, then why not give them something to do, like putting up a basketball court? That way, the streets will be empty and the courts will be full (of tambays).

Lights, Backdrop, etc.

PDEA, we suggest that you go all out with your spending and invest on other equipment to accompany the cameras such as these accessories, and other essentials as well (ring light, tripod, lenses, to name a few). People need to look good. Speaking of which…

Makeup

Of course, our officials would like to look good in front of the camera!

Photo/Video Editing Software

Same day editing is pretty much a booming business these past few years, so the PDEA really need to invest in different software that they can use to immediately edit (and release) their buy-bust operations. Maybe the PCOO can help in fact-checking materials. Win! (Or should we say, Winston?)

Editors

Because who will edit their operations? And editors don’t come cheap! Sabagay, there are the guys at PCOO and RTVM, amirite? Those guys don’t come cheap either.

Sponsor Quarterly Pacquiao Fights

Being a tambay on the street is now considered by officials as a crime (nevermind that vagrancy was already decriminalized), so why not pay the good Senator to fight every quarter of the year? That way you can round up everyone out of the streets and prevent them from doing any crime. The government can keep the revenues from the fights to address the growing inflation. We’re pretty sure this would be against the law but, hey, we hate drugs more. Right?

Got any more suggestions? Share them with us below!