How to Swear Like a Local (SEA Edition)
As much as we can attest that Filipino swear words are truly the most aggressive and offensive insults in the world, our South East Asian neighbors would beg to differ. So if your mouth is badly in need of an upgrade from all the the putanginas and gagos in your foul vocabulary arsenal, here are some epic #@$%@! words courtesy of our Asian neighbors.
8. MALAYSIA: For those times when an ass-kisser suddenly materializes
Word: Boon chon doi
Ass-kissers are everywhere. They can be your officemate who sucks up to your boss or your sibling who washes the dishes only because he wants to go to a party. In these instances, calling them the Malaysian insult “boon chon doi” might be the most rewarding thing to do. The word literally refers to a man who walks behind his boss while reaching between his legs and holding his balls as support. Yeah, WTF right?? But for our Malaysian friends, they use it to call those who live to make sipsip.
Sample usage: “Hi team, briefing in 10 minutes! We’re gonna talk about how boon chon doi our officemate is to our boss!”
7. VIETNAM: When you see a motherfucker
Word: Du ma may
Vietnam’s got a lot of dirty swear words in their vocabulary, and you may want them in yours as well. One of the dirtiest Vietnamese insults is “Du ma may” which simple means mother fucker. It’s fun to say and no one would even know you were calling them that because it sounds just like our own dumamay.
Sample usage: “Du ma may ang lahat ng taxi driver na nagpapadagdag ng bayad!”
6. MALAYSIA: When you’re bored with the word vagina
Sure, kepyas is a pretty cool word. But if you want to be cooler, you may want to use “pukimak”, Malaysia’s word for the female organ.
Sample usage: “Bes, mej weird and pukimak ko.”
5. INDONESIA: When you’re bored with the word penis
“Kontol” is Indonesia’s term for penis which makes it perfect for the hashtag #ControlYourKontol. Let us now thank the etymology gods.
Sample usage: “Bes, mej weird ng kontol ko.”
4. SINGAPORE: When “Putangina mo!” is not vulgar enough
Word: Diu nei lo mo
We’ve all probably been enraged to the point of spewing out nothing but curse words. So if you’re ever in one of these situations, you may want to use Singapore’s “Diu nei lo mo,” which is the counterpart of Putangina mo.
Sample usage: “Sinong kumain ng cake ko na buong araw kong inisip! Diu nei lo mo! DIU NEI LO MO NIYONG LAHAT!”
3. THAILAND: When you can’t even with the neighborhood tsismosa
We all have that one tsismosa in our neighborhood who always has her nose in everyone’s ass and churn out 1,000 words per second. Put a cork on her and call her “bpaag-maah” with a rising tone in the “maah” part. It literally means “dog mouth” but it’s actually used by Thais to call someone who is foul-mouthed.
Sample usage: “Ategurl, here’s 10 pesos so you can buy yourself a hobby and stop being a bpaag-maah.”
2. INDONESIA: When you want a new word for sex
“Ngentot” is an Indonesian slang for sex, and is probably the most bantot-sounding swear word in this list.
Sample usage: “I can’t control my kontol anymore. Let’s have some ngentot!”
1. VIETNAM: When you want to tell someone to fuck a horse
Word: Dit con ngua
“Dit con ngua” is a Vietnamese swear word that literally orders someone to fuck the horse. Yeah.
Sample usage: “SABI MO MAHAL MO AKO, BAKIT MO AKO SINAKTAN! YOU DIT CON NGUA!”
Think you can come up with better? Diu nei lo mo, let us know by all means!